“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7)
Emma Becker Ellis
“My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.” (Galatians 2:20)
Kneeling in church and seeking solace,
forgiving myself not accomplished.
It seemed no matter how much I tried,
feeling defeat - tears flowing I cried.
Then hearing God, He was revealing,
that by myself I can do nothing;
my Son will give forgiveness and grace.
Then, Christ’s love permeated my space.
Stench of animals, dirty bodies,
surrounding crowds jeering and sobbing.
Nailed to a cross, His arms were outstretched -
seek your forgiveness from Me instead!
At Calvary, kneeling before Him,
He granted forgiveness for my sins.
Feeling great joy, my heart He then touched,
For then He said, “I love you this much!”
Emma Becker Ellis
February 10, 2013
Revised May 23, 2013
Emma continues: Feeling confused, sad and depressed many years ago, I sought counseling with a Pastor. He listened to all my ‘excuses’ for not attending services, including my working on Sunday. After praying with me, he kindly suggested I attend services daily at 7am during Lent. He said, “God will give you the answers you are seeking should you come every morning to pray”.
Following the Pastor’s advice, I began to attend services. My dilemma was I could not forgive myself for my transgressions. Still wrestling with the scriptural teachings Jesus Christ forgives, I still could not grasp ‘why’ He would forgive me—for I felt unworthy! While praying daily and shedding tears, I asked Him to help me understand why He could forgive me. It was then I began having a ‘living relationship’ with our Lord.
One Friday morning, during prayer, I began to smell rank odors and could hear the sound of people shouting and crying. Opening my eyes, I looked up and found myself at the foot of the cross in Our Lord’s presence. I heard him say, “I love you this much”! Sobbing, I realized why He forgives. Overwhelmed with joy, I accepted Jesus Christ’s forgiveness and love!
Lord Jesus, as we pray, may we reflect on the loving sacrifice You made for us. May we prayerfully seek Your living presence daily in our lives as we place ourselves at the foot of the cross. Thank You for the saving grace You made available for all mankind, not only when you were crucified, but for all of us now and forever! AMEN
GraceNote Prayer: I read recently, “Expression deepens impression.” I’ve chosen to place Emma’s fine poem first so that our readers will encounter its clear thought. This poem is an excellent example of the fact that through Emma’s writing of this poem, she has enhanced her impression of her thoughts of that moment long ago. Now we too can benefit from her creative “EXPRESSION”. May Emma’s prayer stand as our GraceNote prayer for our lives.